A man can live and be healthy without killing animals for food; therefore, if he eats meat, he participates in taking animal life merely for the sake

-Leo Tolstoy, saying stuff about eating meat...a la BE A VEGETARIAN BIATCH!

Long time no see hey lovers!...

Well, to be fair its entirely the fault of yours truly. I apologise for the lack of posts that happen on this here-wondrous site. Not that any of you actually read it, or are more than just figments of my wild and wacky imagination.

Anywho, the RUSSIAN RESURRECTION FILM FESTIVAL is on again. Or more correctly, it just finished if you reside in Melbourne (aka, the Moscow of Australia...sort of). But if you live in Sunny-ass Sydney you should defs hit it up!

So I thought I'd do a little thing called...

TOP FIVE: THINGS THAT MODERATELY ANNOY ME, BUT NOT ENOUGH TO MAKE ME ACTUALLY DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT

1. Friends. Why, you may ask, does the hit sit-com of the late 90s/early noughties annoy me? The answer is super simple: its NOT THAT FUNNY! I admit, sometimes I find myself laughing at it but its just annoying humour. There is nothing clever about it. And the acting is pretty average. But for some unknown reason, its on ALL THE FUCKING TIME, so sometimes I put it on to spare myself the plight of George Negus (which is something that does actually annoy me enough to make me do something...change the channel).

2. Not having a bin in my bathroom. What do I do when the toilet paper roles finish?!?!?! But alas, I can't be bothered to go to K-mart or where ever to buy one. I'm not lugging that thing home, pfft.

3. Coming up with things to finish these lists with, so this'll be it for now guys.

Also, turns out my rabbit won't eat chicken 'pellets' and is sticking to his diet of ONLY rabbit pellets.

I think they're a bunch of PUSSIES

-James Franco's grandmother, Mitzie Verne, on people who can't watch '127 Hours'

Written from the blood of yours truly, a humbling sacrifice for this blog. Of course the wound has healed and I am up and fit and ready to alert you all to the goings on of whatever we do here at RAWR RUSSIA! This week (or month, they are sort of more bi-monthly posts, hey)...

TOP FIVE: THINGS THAT GIVE ME NIGHTMARES

1.) Pathetic Russian revolution movies that could have been AWESOME, but ultimately weren't due to various circumstance such as the following; actors, direction, dialogue, location, costumes, portrayal of rather VILLAINOUS characters in a light that does not befit their true personality...

Case study: The 2008 Russian epic "Admiral" starring Konstantin Khabenskiy, Elizaveta Boyarskaya and Sergey Bezrukov. This abysmal film turns what could have been an insightful and interesting story of an anti-revolutionary and leader of the White forces, Aleksandr Kolchak, into...A FUCKING ROMANCE! It also portrays Kolchak as a tragic hero, with a deep love for his country. The film brushes over (and by that, I mean completely ignorea) his belief in the autocratic system and tyrannous behaviour when he deemed himself "supreme ruler of Russia". Old Tsarist laws were restored, more then 25,000 people were shot or tortured to death under his command in Ekaterinburg alone, not to mention the 20 or-more concentration camps run by his government by 1920.

I give it: 2.38 cossacks

2.) Growing up. Now that I am officially and legally (in Aussie-land) an adult, the prospect of the future is sufficiently daunting enough to wake me up in cold sweats at night. WHAT DO I DO WITH MY LIFE??!?

3.) The White Stripes are no more! The White Stripes were the first band I really got into when I was 10 or 11, kudos to my big bro Nic for that one. On my 13th birthday, said brother offered to buy me a ticket to see them when they were coming into town. For some unknown and illogical reason my Mum said no. Which is utterly crazy and makes me furious in retrospect (actually it made me furious at the time also). But now I must live with the pain (FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!) that I was ever so close to seeing them live, but alas I will never be granted this opportunity from the gig-gods. Unless they do a reunion tour but I doubt the likelihood of this event ever occurring, sadly, and then of course the issue of my mothers blessing arises once more...

4.) DEATH! I guess, but to be honest I'm not exactly sure. I don't have nightmares that often so I'm scrapping the barrel here, but I assume I dream about dying occasionally and it probably freaks me out...as of yet I haven't been face-to-face with my mortality, but I'll keep you posted.

5.) James Franco. I saw '127 Hours' yesterday. I passed out. Then I vomited. I kid you not. Let's keep it between ourselves, because it wasn't my proudest moment. I'm a vegetarian, so that was possibly responsible. Yes, it was the vegetarianism. Also, the fact that he CUTS OFF HIS ARM! Urgh, the dizzys have started again...

Yes, this face haunts my dreams...

Better a dove on the plate than a woodgrouse in the mating place

-Russian proverb

Top 5: Celebrities who would like rawr russia

1. Lady GaGa. For obvious reasons.

2. Baio from Vampire Weekend. Not only did he STUDY RUSSIAN but he has also been known to tweet about Trotsky and another Russian-esque things. And he's from Vampire Weekend, so he would no doubt like cool, weird, different things so he can talk about them in interviews and seem really smart. Did I mention that I met this guy? WHY DIDN'T I PLUG?

3. Kate Beckinsale. Fairly obvious, as she studied French and RUSSIAN at OFXORD. Smart, Russian= rawr russia.

4. Keira Knightley. I love her bangs, and wish mine would look like that. They don't. But apart from being the most annoying character in Pirates of the Caribbean (although Will Turner wasn't exactly fun, and let's face it JD made that movie. Jack Sparrow is so foine) she also starred in a remake of Doctor Zhivago, and no one could pick up and agree to do that script unless they had a solid admiration for the Russian epic.

5. Katy Perry. Because Gaga reads it, Katy Perry would jump on board too. Mainly just to grab some quick, shallow attention (like her exploits at a recent formal) and she will succeed. I'll die a little inside, but deep down I know that I'd happily sell out. For the good of the world really, because everyone should read this blog, it'll make their meaningless lives that much better.

Anyway, if you happen to KNOW any of these people, let them now because I think they would appreciate the fine genius of yours truly (and Isabella).

Peace out y'all

I think it’s illegal to text and razor scoot at the same time, but whatever. I live dangerously.

-Look at this fucking hipster (see picture below)

Top 5: reasons why Trotsky would hate hipsters!


1. Trotsky was an idealist, as I am sure you are all well aware. Hipsters are just ironic, and it get's old real quickly.


2. Have you SEEN "Look at this fucking hipster"? How can you not hate, Trotsy would be NO exception.





3. As one who wanted CHANGE, Trostky would be disgusted that the whole sub-culture of hipsterdom is a completely un-original; "take your grandmother's sweater and Bob Dylan's wayferers, add jean shorts, Converse All-Stars and a can of Pabst and bam- hipster!"

4. If the revolutionaries were around today, Stalin would probably be a hipster. But then again, I think Lenin would have been an indie. Trotsky would have steered clear of any unconforming conformity and just been himself.

5. Trotsky didn't give a shit if anything was cool or not!