I think they're a bunch of PUSSIES

-James Franco's grandmother, Mitzie Verne, on people who can't watch '127 Hours'

Written from the blood of yours truly, a humbling sacrifice for this blog. Of course the wound has healed and I am up and fit and ready to alert you all to the goings on of whatever we do here at RAWR RUSSIA! This week (or month, they are sort of more bi-monthly posts, hey)...

TOP FIVE: THINGS THAT GIVE ME NIGHTMARES

1.) Pathetic Russian revolution movies that could have been AWESOME, but ultimately weren't due to various circumstance such as the following; actors, direction, dialogue, location, costumes, portrayal of rather VILLAINOUS characters in a light that does not befit their true personality...

Case study: The 2008 Russian epic "Admiral" starring Konstantin Khabenskiy, Elizaveta Boyarskaya and Sergey Bezrukov. This abysmal film turns what could have been an insightful and interesting story of an anti-revolutionary and leader of the White forces, Aleksandr Kolchak, into...A FUCKING ROMANCE! It also portrays Kolchak as a tragic hero, with a deep love for his country. The film brushes over (and by that, I mean completely ignorea) his belief in the autocratic system and tyrannous behaviour when he deemed himself "supreme ruler of Russia". Old Tsarist laws were restored, more then 25,000 people were shot or tortured to death under his command in Ekaterinburg alone, not to mention the 20 or-more concentration camps run by his government by 1920.

I give it: 2.38 cossacks

2.) Growing up. Now that I am officially and legally (in Aussie-land) an adult, the prospect of the future is sufficiently daunting enough to wake me up in cold sweats at night. WHAT DO I DO WITH MY LIFE??!?

3.) The White Stripes are no more! The White Stripes were the first band I really got into when I was 10 or 11, kudos to my big bro Nic for that one. On my 13th birthday, said brother offered to buy me a ticket to see them when they were coming into town. For some unknown and illogical reason my Mum said no. Which is utterly crazy and makes me furious in retrospect (actually it made me furious at the time also). But now I must live with the pain (FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!) that I was ever so close to seeing them live, but alas I will never be granted this opportunity from the gig-gods. Unless they do a reunion tour but I doubt the likelihood of this event ever occurring, sadly, and then of course the issue of my mothers blessing arises once more...

4.) DEATH! I guess, but to be honest I'm not exactly sure. I don't have nightmares that often so I'm scrapping the barrel here, but I assume I dream about dying occasionally and it probably freaks me out...as of yet I haven't been face-to-face with my mortality, but I'll keep you posted.

5.) James Franco. I saw '127 Hours' yesterday. I passed out. Then I vomited. I kid you not. Let's keep it between ourselves, because it wasn't my proudest moment. I'm a vegetarian, so that was possibly responsible. Yes, it was the vegetarianism. Also, the fact that he CUTS OFF HIS ARM! Urgh, the dizzys have started again...

Yes, this face haunts my dreams...